Gabby's 6th Birthday

John Gabriel, my third son, celebrates his 6th birthday today (Feb. 10).

Gabby as we fondly call him is a “guapo (goodlooking) toddler. Endowed with great talents in his studies as a pre-schooler, he is also skilled in fixing things around the house. He would normally fix his broken toys without help from his siblings or parents.

What makes Gabby so special to me is that he was just a newborn baby when his Ate Jo-Anne, then three and a half years of age, died. My fond memories of her include seeing her attend to baby Gabby despite the fact that she was not feeling well. When she died, I almost lost my resolve in life that I kind of take for granted the other kids for a while. Since Gabby was the baby at that time, I remember being left by her mom to take care of him whenever she would have to do some things outside the house. Since Gabby was such a “good” boy, I did not have a hard time taking care of him as I would just put a toy or two and his feeding bottle inside his crib and I would not be bothered by him for hours unless he is already wet and requiring to have a diaper change.

Gabby has since become a symbolic “pet” of her Ate Jo-Anne, even showing a lot of her resemblance in looks. As he grew older, Gabby is a typical toddler who would sometimes be so naughty, sweet and playful. Since he is so “suplado” or discriminating, we would tease him to be a “bakla” or sissy or girl-like. Although I have no doubt that he is not to grow up as gay, we just took fun teasing him for his not-so-ordinary tendencies, like refusing to drink in a glass used by a sibling, refusing food given by a neighbor, or simply being too talkative.

I am a little bit sad that on this day, he is quite sick of fever. But I am also happy at the thought that my son is now six years old, and soon will also grow up to be an adolescent. My prayer is that may God be with him all the days of his life, grow in HIS grace and wisdom, and lead a very successful life.

KP, my eldest is 14

Want to really know for sure how much you are ageing? Well in my case, I simply look at my eldest child, and realize how time flies.

Today, he has turned fourteen (14), his second teener year, endowed with good looks that should work well for him as he engages two or three female teens of his age, maybe more, into what I would describe as “puppy kind of love” boyfriend-girlfriend relationships. I hope nothing turns out serious yet as he still has a lot to learn in life before getting into real life’s troubles.

But modesty aside, while my eldest son, Kyron Paul, is a typical teener who commits a lot of heart-breaking mis-adventures for his parents, I am still proud of him. He was a long time favorite, the firstborn, who is undoubtedly closer to his “papa” than to his “mama.” He was the apple of my eye for long.

He is growing up, and my prayers are that he becomes a good, caring and responsible person. That he be able to establish a better life, a good family and career or business in his own time.

It is difficult to explain to kids these days why they are being admonished to refrain from doing certain things, that we as parents know and believe are harmful to them or their future. But I still trust that this generation, like mine, is smart enough to learn on their own, the very basics of life skills- that will allow them to blend well into society without putting themselves at risk and the ability to discern what is right and beneficial. More importantly, never to repeat the mistakes of their parents and elders.

For now, my heart is joyous, happy birthday my son!

I BELIEVE

I believe that everything happens for a reason and purpose, and it serves me.

I believe that there is no such thing as a failure. There are only results and learning experiences.

I believe no matter what happens, I should take responsibility.

I believe it is not necessary to understand everything to be able to use everything.

I believe that people are my greatest resource.

I believe that work is play.

I believe that there is no abiding success without commitment.

I believe that there are no limits to my learning and earning capacities.

I believe that I will reap exactly what I sow.

I believe that adversity has the effect of eliciting talents which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant.

I believe what I think of myself is much more important that what others think of me.

I believe that there exists limitless opportunities in every industry, where there is an open mind, there will always be a frontier.

I believe that the superior man makes demands upon himself, the inferior man makes demands on others.

I believe times will change for the better, when I change.

I believe if happiness is not already found within, it will never be found outside.

I believe that every resource I need is already with me and within me.

I believe that if I have to live in peace of mind, I have to live each day in accordance to, and in harmony with, my values.

I believe that the past does not equal to future.

I believe giving is at the core of human relationship. Give time, commitment, energy, support, prayer and love.

I believe that I should seek my joy in what I give and not in what I get.

I believe that we are all energy, and that we have a need to express this energy.

I believe that unexpressed energy causes dysfunction and disease within our body, mind and spirit.

I believe that our purpose for being here is to experience, express and expand our understanding of, and capacity to love.

I believe that the way we think, what we say, and how we act creates our reality.

I believe we can all attain peace, happiness, abundance and contentment.

I believe that no one needs to suffer.

I believe that suffering, stress, guilt, worry, jealousy, etc. are man-made devices that stem from fear.

I believe we come into this life with a script, designed by the areas within us that need healing and the circumstances of our life are the perfect circumstances to help us heal.

I believe that everything in our lives stem from two thought forms - love or fear.

I believe that we respond to our experiences through actions of love or actions of fear.

I believe that the only thing we ultimately have control over in our lives is whether we are happy or sad.

I believe that addiction is a fear-based search for an answer - something to make us "okay".

I believe that what we are truly addicted to are negative core messages, and these messages create beliefs that take on many different physical forms in everyone's lives.

I believe that we can all achieve authentic and enduring healing.

I believe that God loves us all infinitely.

Papa's Girl

My only surviving girl (the elder died in 2003 at age 3 1/2), Ma. Angelica or Angel celebrated her 7th birthday last Oct. 1 with a simple salu-salo attended by some neighbors and relatives (from her mother's side).

Angel is envied for supposedly "papa's girl" who gets anything I can afford and gets away with minor infraction of house rules. Truth is, she is not. It is just that being a girl, I understand her being a girl-child. Why not, when I have been an advocate of women's and children's rights for long?

I would usually explain to her mom that I am not trying to spoil her. Actually her being close and sweet to me allows us a rather more open line of communication, so that I can easily understand her, and would know how to handle her emotions and angst.

Although admittedly, children who feel that they are so special would have a tendency to overreact by displaying some attitude. Occasionally that happens too with my Angel. But what is important is that even at her tender age, she enjoys the advantage, and understands the disadvantage of being a girl.

ALL HYPE AND MATERIALISM

( I just wish to share my blog on an online article of Phil. Daily Inquirer regarding an online petition to recall Pampanga Governor Among Ed Panlilio).

I am honored to have met Gov. Among Ed Panlilio last June 2008, also meeting his controversial lieutenant, Provincial Administrator Vivian Dabu. I even teased the latter that she has become rather prominent because of the controversies at the Pampanga capitol. And because I used to work for a good governor too, who was almost similar to Panlilio in terms of religiosity, except that he is not a priest but a celibate Opus Dei, I only had encouraging words for Dabu - that you really cannot satisfy many in politics, especially if you are doing what is right.

Well Atty. Dabu may not be such a good public administrator, but that job really calls for utmost trust and confidence from her boss, the governor. Her job is among those considered by law as co-terminus with the appointing authority and thus, requires only trust and confidence from the latter. So making her the center of all issues for a recall of the incumbent is really mind-boggling. Besides, Panlilio hardly has been in office for a year and a half, and to judge him so unfairly in his performance, is really something I cannot understand from those Kapampangans calling for his recall or resignation.

My wife happens to be a Kapampangan and we lived in Mabalacat for more than 5 years. Hence, my keen interest in the issue. I also know for a fact how disappointed some favor seekers when they went to the capitol after Panlilio assumed office, and went back home empty handed. Why? They were used to the old system that when they visit the capitol, they would have at least something to bring home, either cash or some goodies.

I would assume that since Panlilio won on a platform of reform and good governance, he would not follow the footsteps of his predecessors in practicing patronage politics, hence the change is really felt, especially by many who have materialistic intentions.

For the fault-finders at the capitol, Panlilio is an easy target, but people should really think hard and analyze the intentions of those people trying to bring down a neophyte executive who must have done more good to Pampanga than harm. He has brought Pampanga to the national psyche because of his crusade against corruption and illegal gambling, and in showing us that good still triumphs over evil, if only a few good men will take lead.

If any harm has been done, it must really be in threatening the business of illegal gambling and its lords, and putting in peril the future of its beneficiary-politicians.

But like Panlilio and the many who believe in his crusade, I have faith that good will triumph over evil, but not without a price - which is the vigilance of the people of Pampanga against those who seek to take advantage of the materialism of many people. I hope that you will not live up to the joke that you people out there are “mukang pera” and show us that the great province of Pampanga can lead this country in a moral crusade for good governance.

Bunso’s birthday!

Joshua Rafael Andrei or simply Andrei, my youngest, turned four (4) years old Tuesday, September 2, 2008. We had a simple family celebration last Saturday, August 30 when I came home from a week-long work in the capital. While it was a very modest celebration, I could sense the joy in my son, getting his favorite “ube-flavored” cake and palabok from Red Ribbon, and of course, his dream “dump truck” toy.

Life has been difficult lately, almost since the year started, and having a small celebration is really quite a feat for the kids. Well it pains me a lot that they have to sacrifice so much at such a young age, but the realities of a failing economy is really taking its toll even on supposedly gainfully employed citizens like me.

As a parent, I would like my kids to have some treasured memories of their birthdays that whenever one is approaching, I am almost always apprehensive. I have always prayed to God for provisions, and indeed, He never fails me.

As a “bunso” or youngest child, Andrei is sweet, and I am proud of the fact that he is never a brat. Matter of fact, he is one of a kind, in comparison to other kids of the same age, at least those whom I have observed. While he is “bulol” like his dad when I was the same age, and most of what he says is incomprehensible to me, what I understand is that he talks a lot, understands a lot and is very expressive of what he thinks. This is a very positive sign that he would also grow up just like his siblings, full of ideas, questions and opinions – a sign that he is a bright kid, as would the elders would often say.

Well, all my kids are actually sweet, especially the younger ones. My only surviving girl, Angel shown in photo here with another sweet son, Gabriel is so fond of his “papa” too, and she is a great source of inspiration. Why not, when I have lost her elder sister in 2003 and thought I could never recover? Thank God, that while any child is irreplaceable, I still got another little girl to cheer me up. But it was not a fast or an easy process to go through.


But I have learned that truly one cannot live alone. One has to have some source of strength to draw from – a family. There are no perfect relationships, neither a perfect partner, but there is such a thing called patience, borne out of love.

I am just too glad and apprehensive again, that my only girl is turning seven (7) in October, and I am bound to provide for a good memorable celebration for her reaching a milestone. Right now, everything that’s running in my head is a set of options. Whatever it amounts to, that should be the subject of my next personal blog.

introspection

“So what makes the Filipino special? We are brown, spiritual, timeless, spaceless, linguists, groupists, weavers, adventurers. Seldom do all these profound qualities find personification in a people. Filipinos should allow - and should be allowed to contribute their special traits to the world-wide community of men- but first,we should know and like ourselves”. – Pastor Ed Lapiz

Sometimes after having spent so much of your youth being a fighter and an idealist, and eventually losing your way in the maze, you hardly find courage to bounce and leap. But then again, what is one’s life worth if not lived the way it should? Even the most incorrigible is given another chance, then why not me?

“In this age of darkness, there are two ways of spreading light: You may either be a candle, or the mirror that reflects its light.” – Ninoy Aquino


As one grows older, the more you realize how important legacy is. Since not everyone is cut out to be a hero, we can still make a difference in our own little ways. Nothing is too late for something good.


Be the change you want the world to be – Gandhi

(Because) we can change the future by changing it today - J. Maxwell